FinDom, JOI and other fetish guides

It was only when I took a good look at the pattern of my camshows over weeks, months, and now years, that I realized just how fetish based most of them are! When I first started out as a camgirl I thought it would be all nude stripping, dancing, dirty talk, with maybe a little foot fetish thrown in for good measure. I know I've spoken about this elsewhere, but it honestly amazes and delights me every day, how interesting my webcam interactions are 

So from now on I'm going to be doing a regular 'fetish spot' on my blog where I talk about specific fetishes that I get asked about most often. The main one of which is of course, jerk off instruction, or JOI, masturbation instruction, guided masturbation etc, whatever you want to call it...

First time

The first time I encountered this particularly engrossing fetish was early on in my camgirl career, probably March or April of 2011. I was all dressed up in my vintage nylons, suspender belt, sexy bra and panties etc, with toys at the ready, when a rather good looking gent I was cam to camming with surprised me with an usual request. "Tell me how to do it" he demanded; perplexed I asked him what he meant. "I want you to instruct me on how to wank.... please" (he was very polite!). So ensued a 45 minute session whereby I described in minute detail, everything I wanted to see him do in order to bring himself to orgasm.

When he'd gone the biggest grin spread across my face. For the first time since I started camming i felt fulfilled. Although I hadn't personally cum, it didn't matter. the experience of pleasuring someone remotely, with just my voice, using my imagination to create and enact the erotic scenario, and using his own cues (tone of voice, trigger words, body language etc) to increase the intensity, was so....intimate. I felt powerful, sexy, sensual, and so incredibly turned on, It was like a drug and that was me hooked!

What is JOI?

Some girls talk about JOI like it's just something ordinary, a 5 or 10 minute scripted session with specific keywords designed to be 'sexy', maybe with a countdown to orgasm thrown in at the end. But I think this approach completely misses the point. Anyone can talk dirty (they can right??), anyone can tell someone what to do, but just what is it that makes a live webcam show or fetish phone chat really, truly erotic? Connection! It is the je-ne-sais-quoi that takes sexy to a new level. When you have connection it can make you both feel as though you are together, there in the moment, that your words are quite literally stroking each other... like a fingertip tantalizingly trailed across your lower lip.

This is the secret

So what is the secret to obtaining this connection, of making jerk off instruction more than simply 'instruction'? It is engagement. when I have a guy ask me for guided masturbation I imagine i am there next to him, I think of the things I would do to make him feel good, I feel like we are together and act accordingly. I adore giving sloppy blowjobs for example, because of the reaction I get looking up at him with my big brown eyes, my long hair falling down over his skin, as my soft lips caress his throbbing shaft. So I might ask him to use some lube, drizzle it over the end of his cock and stroke a single finger up and down his length. I ask him to imagine that's the tip of my tongue, teasingly lapping up his precum.. ask him how it feels, does he like it when a girl wraps her soft lips around him? Yes? Then have him encircle the end of his dick with thumb and forefinger and slowly push back the foreskin etc. I could go on but perhaps you ought to come and visit me on cam if you like the sound of all this? haha.

I don't mean this to sound like a 'do as I do' or like some kind of instruction manual. Every person is different, some like the slow, sensual drawn out scenarios, while others prefer a more dominant, demanding approach. Some too, actually prefer the 'scripted' sort of sessions i described a couple of paragraphs back. The key is to engage, to be IN the moment. I might be 'instructing' someone how to wank, but that doesn't mean I am passive. Quite the contrary. I want to experience the moment, whether it is 5 minutes, or over an hour. Some of my JOI sessions have in fact lasted over 12 hours! When combined with edging, mutual masturbation, tease and denial, other fetishes like cuckold, role-play etc, it isn't just masturbation anymore, it is pure, blissful, erotica.

Powerful stuff! 

Katie xxx

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